Have you given up shaking hands? Fear of catching H1N1 is so bad that TV host Kathie Lee Gifford is bumping butts instead.

As H1N1 sweeps through schools and workplaces, the handshake is going the way of the dinosaur. Old niceties have flown out the door to be replaced by some, ahem, swinish behavior.

Schools and workplaces are being urged to take measures to curb the spread of H1N1.

OSHA’s guidelines on how to deal with a pandemic indicate that a handshake is bad form these days. In fact, it is surprising that there isn’t a federal ban.

For example, OSHA urges business people:

• Avoid close contact (within 6 feet) with coworkers and customers. (Wow, you’d need long arms to bridge that gap).
• Avoid shaking hands and always wash your hands after physical contact with others. (But what do you do instead?)
• If wearing gloves, always wash your hands after removing them. (“Sorry, Jack, I’ll just put my gloves on to seal the deal!”)
• Minimize group meetings; use e-mails, phones and text messaging. If meetings are unavoidable, avoid close contact (within 6 feet) with others and ensure that the meeting room is properly ventilated.

Can you imagine how Kathie Lee’s butt bumping would go down at your next business meeting?

“Mary, please meet our president, Jack Gifford … ”

“Delighted to bump you, Jack!”

That’ll work. NOT.

How are you replacing the handshake?

Are you nodding your head and mumbling something about how you’d love to shake his hand but you’re really worried he’s the Typhoid Mary of 2009?

You can get more info on business planning for swine flu and recommended behavior at Flu.gov.

Julie Power is editor in chief of the print publication, Internet &  Marketing Report and the companion blog, eIMR.blogspot.com.

She twitters @JuliePower.